Secret single behavior…’fess up, ladies!

As with many single gals, I have plenty of SSB – secret single behavior. About six years’ worth, because that’s how long I’ve lived alone. On Sex and the City, as Carrie is contemplating moving in with Aidan, she contemplates how living with a man is going to interfere with her SSB. (Eating saltines with grape jelly while standing in the kitchen reading fashion magazines, to name just one.) There are certain things we just don’t DO with men around. And when you live alone, you don’t realize how fucking weird you are until faced with cohabitation. Namely with a man.

I laughed out loud at the HelloGiggles post – some of them on there I do. Last night for instance: I was in a particularly shitty emotional place. I went to Target for a picture frame for a new print I have and came out with everything from their food section and of course forgot the frame. I wasn’t even in the mood to buy nail polish. I know. I took my sad gal self home and had tater tots and a Magnum ice cream bar for dinner. Unapologetically. And it was damn good. I even posted about it on my Facebook. Evidently, weirdness for being a single grown-up can sometimes be publicly applauded if it’s humorous enough. For the record, I usually have salad for dinner.

What are my secret-secret SSBs? The usual pinching, poking, plucking, trimming, shaving. Looking at myself in the mirror too much whilst making faces. Checking out my pores (just like Charlotte) and picking at blemishes. Singing songs to my cats. Making eggs while being topless (almost every morning – I sort of doubt a man would complain about that, but you never know). I listen to the same song over and over sometimes, which I’d never do if someone was around. (A lot of times that involves Blondie.) And obviously I’ve seen each episode of Sex and the City at least 20 times, and I wish I were exaggerating about that. Oh and The Hills seasons 2-4 are my absolute favorite things to watch over and over. I really love Lauren Conrad and Audrina Patridge more than it’s okay to admit.

Now, you’ll have to excuse me…I have another super late dinner in the makings and I think it may entail chips, pickles, really good chocolate and sliced deli cheese. This is just where I’m at in life right now. Oh, and I’m totally spending the night with my boyfriend. And by boyfriend I mean Javier Bardem. And he won’t even be speaking English tonight. *wink*

Please tell us about your own SSB in the comments!


4 comments on “Secret single behavior…’fess up, ladies!

  1. I make up songs and sing them to my cat. I sing bad opera in the shower. I eat peanut butter straight from the jar on a spoon. I watch sappy chick flicks and cry a lake of tears.

  2. I’ll admit this, I walk around my apartment naked. A lot. I also cuddle with my dog by using him as a pillow.

  3. I eat all sorts of weird things at odd hours. I cook giant meals and mess up the kitchen and leave it all a mess and go to bed. I play my guitar at all hours of the night repetitively and try to figure out guitar tabs for songs I don’t have tabs for – which is undoubtedly infuriating to listen to. I sing along to the radio, sing in the shower, and talk nonsense to my cats, and hang out naked. I watch bad crime shows and read trashy fiction. I’m basically a single gal to the core even though I have a boyfriend now… and he’s the same way, so I don’t know how we’d ever live together (he goes without pants, apparently, ALL THE TIME).

Leave a Reply to vMonster Cancel reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: